Wumpus Central

Home of the brain of Wumpus.

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Alphabetical Wumpus Code

Here you go Bonk!


Angel=Bagel
Another=A Boner
Back-Black
Believer=Bullwievel
City=Pussy
Crazy=Naked
Cry=Drink
Dance=Fuck
Diamond=Dumb Ass
Eye=Boob
Face=Dick
Fever/Feeling/Freedom=Penis
Future=Butthole
Girl/Gal/etc.=Goat
Give=Lick
Hand=Ass
Heat/Hot=Fat
Heart=Fart
Hold=Spank
Home=Stoned
Hot/Heat=Fat
Kiss=Piss
Live/Life=Milk
Lonely=Homely
Love=Drug
Magic/Music=Mookie
Mind=Dick
Money=Monkey
Night=Elf
Other=Boner
People/Person=Penis
Put=Suck
Road=Toad
Rock=Cock
Roll=Balls
Save=Shave
Sing=Smoke
Something=Puntang (or is it Poontang?)
Song=Bong
Soul=Hole
Street=Toad
Sun/Son=Shit
Tears=Beers
Time=Twine
Tonight=The Elf
Town=Snatch
Woman/Lady/Honey/etc.=Donkey
Work=Whack
Years=Beers

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Upcoming Shows

First off, we get to hear the new mixes of N.O.T.E.S. at Jon's place tomorrow night!! This thing is very close to being done.

Phil's Pub Aug.26
Wumpus
Sleepeater
The Kidcrash

Phil's Pub Aug. 27
Wumpus until you puke Sizer out your nose!

Mad Rock Pub Sept. 3
Wumpus

Terminal Bar (Minneapolis) Sept. 10
Wumpus
P. Skunk
Great Girls Blouse

Phil's Pub Oct. 14-15
Wumpus' debut album N.O.T.E.S. is released into the wild to fend for itself.....
expect the almost unpredictable at this one. or. expect to be unexpected.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

I found a Doppelganger!
Guess where this was taken and win a free firearm!

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Shiny Happy

Today at work, Jason and I realized that the lyrics to the song Shiny Happy People by R.E.M. translate to "Shiny happy penis spanking ass" when you use the Fish on Toast translation. So. I decided to blog the entire list of translations on this post.

First some ground rules.

You may make any word you change plural if need be and you can fudge some of the non-essential peripheral words to make sense out of the whole thing. All you do is memorize this list and listen to the radio, all the while, translating away to your hearts (or should I say farts) content. This makes work, car rides, etc. much more fun. Here goes.

Dance=Fuck
Love=Drug
Hand=Ass
Hold=Spank
Believer=Bullwievel
Kiss=Piss
Something=Puntang (or is it Poontang?)
Home=Stoned
Night=Elf
Magic/Music=Mookie
Tonight=The Elf
Girl/Gal/etc.=Goat
Woman/Lady/Honey/etc.=Donkey
Save=Shave
City=Pussy
Lonely=Homely
Future=Butthole
Time=Twine
Fever/Feeling/Freedom/People/Person=Penis
Song=Bong
Sing=Smoke
Sun/Son=Shit
Angel=Bagel
Eye=Boob
Street/Road=Toad
Hot=Fat
Rock=Cock
Roll=Balls
Cry=Drink
Heart=Fart
Live/Life=Milk
Face/Mind=Dick
Years/Tears=Beers
Work=Whack
Money=Monkey
Heat/Hot=Fat
Soul=Hole
Back-Black
Town=Snatch
Other=Boner
Another=A Boner
Put=Suck
Give=Lick
Crazy=Naked
Diamond=Dumb Ass

I may have missed some. If so, I'll edit the text later.
enjoy!

last edited 8-27-05 12:26p.m.

Monday, August 08, 2005

opening script for "It's too Good"

Outside of an average midwestern home, camera angle sweeps into and through a small basement window of the average midwestern home. Interior of a small room renovated for recording music, with microphones, sound mixing equipment and instruments arranged neatly on shelving. Inside, four adult men are drinking vodka and making light conversation after band practice in the adjacent, soundproofed rehearsal room. In a corner of the control room, a large 1990's vintage boombox emits music from the local rock band SLEEPEATER. Two minutes and fifteen seconds into the track entitled "GHOST SONG", we find local band wumpus, huddled into a close group. We'll join them, in the middle of their booze-induced discussion.

Barkey: These guys are too good.
DSSTM: It's like... you know
Scotty: It's not fair. They're too good. Jon did such a great job. It's not fair.
Rory: Yep.
Barkey: Did you see the artwork? I mean...
Scotty: Yeah, look at it. it's amazing. but more importantly, their music is SO good. I mean, fucking listen to this. what is that, a removed fifth or something? does that chord even exist?
DSSTM: It's... you know, it's a great record.
Barkey: You know, they've really raised the bar.
Rory: They really have.
DSSTM: It's ...singular.
Scotty: Let's KILL them.


character BARKEY and SCOTTY erupt into instant laughter and raise coffeecups of iced vodka.
the happy laughter among friends fades as the camera moves back via same trajectory through window and out through the whispering pines outside in the yard of the average midwestern home.